The alienation associated with student cliques is harsher at some Loudoun schools than others, teens say.
Middle- and high-school students met last Wednesday to talk about why they hang around with the people they do, similarities and differences, and how to diffuse cliques. Emily Blackstock said she and Sarah Beatty are Òlike best friendsÓ who attend J. L. Simpson Middle School in Leesburg. They belong to the same clique.
Emily said the cliques are very exclusive there. She cited two: popular and rich. The schoolÕs unspoken rule basically says, ÒIf you donÕt mess with mine, I wonÕt mess with yours.Ó
If a student breaks that rule, ÒYouÕd basically be alone,Ó she said.
Sarah said students are more aware of the cliques when the yearbooks come out. Someone who does not belong to a clique might have the nerve to ask for a signature. The usual answer is a roll of the eyes and an excuse to do it later. Only later never comes.
She and Emily agreed itÕs better not to push it ÒI tried that once. I ended up getting punched in the face,Ó Emily said. ÒIÕm not going to try that again.Ó
THE DIALOGUE among the teens emerged from a forum held at Rust Library in Leesburg in conjunction with Loudoun Youth Week. The sponsor was La Voz of Loudoun, a group that works to unite the Hispanic community by assisting immigrants and their families in the process of integration into Loudoun County.
Robin Geiger led the event. Alicia Waning served as a Spanish translator.
Devi Shiwdhan, who attends Heritage High School, said she doesnÕt see the sharp division at her school that exists at J. L. Simpson. ÒIÕm friends with rich and popular people,Ó she said. ÒYou intermingle.Ó
Emily, however, said cliques exist in middle and high schools. Her boyfriend said itÕs conspicuous at Loudoun County High School.
Victor Baires said he hangs out with his Hispanic friends. Victor said he would not mind spending time with people of other cultures, but they donÕt live in his neighborhood. ÒBecause we donÕt live together, we canÕt hang out together,Ó he said.
Victor said some students will decide not to like someone because he or she is American or Hispanic, but he does not share that prejudice.
Ana Rosario Quijano, who also is Hispanic, said she hangs with Asian students, because they all share a love for music and play instruments. When she first attended Notre Dame Academy in Middlebury, she felt the difference of being one of two Hispanic students in the 120-member American Philharmonic. She said it was Òreally tough,Ó but her peers eventually ÒacceptedÓ her Ò
Devi, who practices the Hindu religion, said she doesnÕt believe faith plays a part in deciding which students hang with other students.
IN ADDITION to the dialogue among the teens, their parents also formed a group to discuss what they thought about the impact of cliques and cultures on their own children.
Patricia Spetz, a field assistant with the Loudoun County Girl Scouts, presented the parentsÕ views. She said they believe itÕs their own biases that influence their children. As a result, Caucasians are more likely to hang out with other Caucasians and Hispanics will spend time with people of their own heritage or with other minorities, she said.
While culture and race have a bearing on who their children hang out with, religion does not, the parents said.
To combat the problems that come with cliques, they suggested their teens take the time to learn about other people.
Parents can help their children to overcome their prejudices if they invite their childrenÕs peers of different cultures into their homes. ÒIÕm Hispanic,Ó she said. ÒHave friends try our food. Take away the unknown.Ó
Sarah said she would like the barriers of cliques to break down. ÒEveryone should at least meet people before they judge them,Ó she said.
Victor said it would help if there was a way to get around the geographical barriers.
Jesse Saldana said students can avoid cliquey conflicts. ÒDonÕt avoid people when they come into school,Ó he said. ÒInvite them into your general activities or just call them and talk to them. Introduce them to friends.Ó
Spetz said the teens and parents who attended the forum already were open minded. ÒHow do you penetrate and get through to people who arenÕt here? Maybe thatÕs a good question for the future?Ó